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Here’s the definition for obedience I had them to memorize: obedience is doing what you are told, when you are told to do it, with the right heart attitude.    I would divide them into three groups and give them one of the phrases and have them give that part of the definition when I pointed at them.   Then I would change the phrase for each group.   I drilled it into their minds.
We had some good teams, but I felt the greatest good I could do for them was that at the end of the year that each player understood obedience in a measurable way.    Most all of them had never been taught what obedience looked like in a tangible way and a lot of them had never been expected to obey.   I enforced it ruthlessly (and kindly).
I wanted them to do precisely “what” I said and exactly “when” I said to do it and to have a “good attitude” about their response.    I was consistent with my expectation and felt that most of the parents supported me because I was helping them, too.
The second area that I taught them was to be attentive.   You cannot have obedience without attentiveness.   The foundation of obedience is attentiveness.  My players heard this from me so many times, “You can’t obey if you are not listening”.   I told them that when I was talking they were to look at me in the eyes.   My desire was that they do the same for their parents, teachers and others in authority.
If I was teaching them or just talking to them after a game in the dugout, frequently, especially in the early part of the season, I would stop and say, “Look at me in the eyes.   How do I know you are listening to me?”    And they would all respond, “When we look in your eyes”.
I’m sure to some of those boys that I was the meanest coach in the world, not because I had a temper, but because I refused to allow them to not obey or to be inattentive.   It was a struggle, but it was worthwhile for me as a coach in order to teach them anything.   Better yet, those that applied it will later see success others around them, even those with more gifts and intellect, will not have because of the power of (1) being attentive and (2) obeying completely and with a good attitude.
If you were to ask my children they would say they heard those two things many, many times when they were growing up.   As parents, Paula and I weren’t just trying to teach them how to make a living, but how to live.
The coming posts will deal with this vital subject in very practical terms for parents.   Here is a simple thesis for my covering this topic: parents educate their children best when they initiate it, accept responsibility for it, and model it.    The “it” is primarily character-based training though I think parents can teach their children academically using the same approach.
It’s never too late to start doing what is right.   My heart is to be an encouragement to parents.   God is a God of second chances (and third and fourth!).  There are no perfect kids and there are no perfect parents.   All of us are a work in progress.
I hope these words from the Bible will give you some insight and strength to continue doing that most important task God has given to us, to train our children to know and to serve Him.